Chuckle 1346

Chuckle 1346
(Today's chuckles thanks go to Phyllis H of Carpinteria CA!)

Someone sent me this college picture of Phyllis.



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~Life in Alaska ~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years. Finally sick of the stress he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.

After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens It and sees a huge, bearded man standing there.

"Name's Lars, your neighbor from forty miles up the road...Having a Christmas party Friday night...Thought you might like to come. About 5:00."

"Great", says Tom, "after six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you."

As Lars is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you...There's gonna be some drinkin'."

"Not a problem" says Tom. "After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em."

Again, the big man starts to leave and stops. "More 'n' likely gonna be some fightin' too."

"Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right. I'll be there. Thanks again."

"More'n likely be some wild sex, too."

"Now that's really not a problem" says Tom, warming to the idea "I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the way, what should I wear?"

"Whatever you want. Just gonna be the two of us." ***

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(Click Today in History and learn.)
. Today in history
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(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
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~Some Clever Thoughts~ from Dick L of Florence OR

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Phillip's Screwdriver?
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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)