Chuckle 3860

Chuckle 3860
(Today’s Chuckle thanks go to Nancy V of Florence OR)

These are classified ads, which were actually placed in U.K. Newspapers:

(Plus: today in history, word for the day, today’s horoscope, Maxine and Herman)

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 
8 years old,
Hateful little bastard.
Bites!

FREE PUPPIES 
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES. 
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100. 

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .. 
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.

**** And the WINNER is... ****

FOR SALE BY OWNER.
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

Statement of the Century 
Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker--Billy Connolly.   "If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, How come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"

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(Today in History Click)
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
www.merriam-webster.com/word-of-the-day

(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/8404539/

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Maxine

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Herman