Chuckle 5194

Chuckle 5194

(Today’s Chuckle thanks go to Keith K of Florence OR)

~Things to Ponder~ Pt 1 (Plus: Today in history, Word for the day, Today’s horoscope, Aunty Acid and Sign )


~  When one door closes and another door opens, you’re probably in prison.

 ~  To me, “drink responsibly” means don’t spill it.

 ~  When I say, “The other day,” I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago.

 ~  Interviewer: “So, tell me about yourself.”

    Me: “I’d rather not.  I kinda want this job.”

 ~  Cop: “Please step out of the car.”

    Me: “I’m too drunk.  You get in.”

 ~  I remember being able to get up without making sound effects.

 ~  I had my patience tested.  I’m negative.

 ~  Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid the doesn’t fit any of your containers.

 ~  If you’re sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say “Did you bring the money?”

 We must always take sides.  Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim.  Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.  Elie Wiesel



(Today in History Click)
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
www.merriam-webster.com/word-of-the-day

(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
http://www.prokerala.com/astrology/horoscope/

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Aunty Acid

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Sign