Chuckle 1018

Chuckle 1018
(Dean O of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)

~One Last Fling~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day)

I was a very happy person. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.

There was only one little thing bothering me-her beautiful younger sister.

My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight mini-skirts, and generally was braless. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a pleasant view of her private parts. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.

One day her "little" sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.

Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me."

I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled off her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.

I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.

Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family!"

And the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car!
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(Click Today in History and learn.)

• Today in history


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Word of the Day for Thursday April 20, 2006

patina \PAT-n-uh; puh-TEEN-uh\, noun:1. The color or incrustation which age gives to works of art; especially, the green rust which covers ancient bronzes, coins, and medals.2. The sheen on any surface, produced by age and use.3. An appearance or aura produced by habit, practice, or use.4. A superficial layer or exterior.

[The ship] was sleek and black, her decks scrubbed smooth with holystones, her deckhouses glistening with the yellowed patina of old varnish.-- Gary Kinder, Ship of Gold in the Deep Blue Sea

A patina of coal dust lies over everything.-- "A Railroad Runs Through It," review of Stations: An Imagined Journey, by Michael Flanagan, New York Times, October 23, 1994

Rothko himself was guilty of making ponderous statements about the religious and mythic dimensions of his art; and Mrs. Ashton has adopted this clumsy impulse, laying over his work a heavy patina of commentary that seems designed to show off her own wide-ranging intellect.-- Michiko Kakutani, review of About Rothko, by Dore Ashton, New York Times, November 7, 1983
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