Chuckle 1663

Chuckle 1663
(Cecil R of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~Purina Dog Chow~ (2nd time around)
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

The next time someone asks you a dumb question, wouldn't you like to respond like this .?

Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena the wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired, with little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!

WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.

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(Click Today in History and learn.)
. Today in history
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(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
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Chuckle Gems:

Our thanks go to Jayne C of Florence OR for;
Weird Things You Would Never Know!! (But do now!)

A snail can sleep for three years.

No word in the English language rhymes with "MONTH."

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)