Chuckle 4245

Chuckle 4245

(Today’s Chuckle thanks go to Jane C of Florence OR.)

~Home Schooled~ Part 1(Plus: Today in history, Word for the day, Today’s horoscope, Maxine and 6 Diff’s)

Most of our generation of 60+ years were HOME SCHOOLED in many ways...

         

 1.  My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL  DONE.            

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished I Was Home-Schooled cleaning."

2.  My mother taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3.  My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4.  My father taught me LOGIC.

" Because I said so, that's why."

5.  My mother taught me CONSEQUENCES.

"If you fall out and break your leg, don't come running to me."

6.  My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7.  My father taught me IRONY.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8.  My father taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.            

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9.  My mother taught me about CONSERVATIONISM.

"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10.  My mother taught me about STAMINA.

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11.  My mother taught me about WEATHER.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12.  My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

(Today in History Click)
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
www.merriam-webster.com/word-of-the-day

(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/8404539/

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Maxine

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Eye exercise time; Spot the 6 diff’s