Chuckle 1702

Chuckle 1702
(Phyllis H of Carpinteria CA gets today’s chuckle thanks!)


~A Point Well Made~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day, Today’s Horoscope and
Six Differences.)

I was walking down the street when I was approached by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago", the homeless woman told me.

"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time shopping," the homeless woman said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive,"

"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" I asked. "Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!"

"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight."

The homeless Woman was shocked. "Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

I said, "That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine." ***
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(Click Today in History and learn.)
• Today in history
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(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
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(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
Today's Horoscope )
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Chuckle Gems.

Thanks go to Pam S of Roseville CA for; “The Wonderful English Language”. If you've learned to speak fluent English, you must be a genius!

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

10. I did not object to the object.

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13. They were too close to the door to close it.
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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)