Chuckle 1703

Chuckle 1703
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Joyce K of Florence AZ!)


~Four Getting Older Chuckles? (2nd time around)
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and Today’s Horoscope.)

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?"

"98," she replied. "Two years older than me."

"So you're 96," the undertaker commented.

She responded, “Hardly worth going home, is it?”

*****************************************************************************

Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.

She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

*****************************************************************************

The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.

*****************************************************************************

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. I can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. I’ve lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license. ***

This email was cleaned by emailStripper, available for free from http://www.papercut.biz/emailStripper.htm
________________________________________________________

(Click Today in History and learn.)
• Today in history
______________________________________________________

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
________________________________________________________

(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
Today's Horoscope )
___________________________________________________________

Chuckle Gems.

Thanks go to Pam S of Roseville CA for; “The Wonderful English Language”. If you've learned to speak fluent English, you must be a genius!

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
_____________________________________________________________

Have a Nice Day