Chuckle 990

Chuckle 990
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Rick R of Surrey BC!)

~Ernesto~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Señor Lucky? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor that your parrot died."
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Señor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. "What did he die from?"
"From eating rotten meat, Señor"
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senior. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"Your thoroughbred, Señor Lucky. He died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Señor"
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the.....!!! But there's electricity at the house!!! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Señor."
“WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!"
"Your wife's, Señor...She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."

SILENCE..................

"Ernesto if you broke that driver, you're in deep shit!" ***
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(Click Today in History and learn.)

• Today in history

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Word of the Day for Thursday March 23, 2006

paterfamilias \pay-tuhr-fuh-MIL-ee-uhs; pat-uhr-; pah-\, noun;plural patresfamilias \pay-treez-; pat-reez-; pah-treez-\:The male head of a household or the father of a family.

His father served as paterfamilias to the entire García clan, dispensing money and advice to those who needed it, and the family, in turn, revered him.-- Leslie Stainton, Lorca: A Dream of Life

Just after World War II the paterfamilias, Eric, briefly abandons his wife and children for a doomed romance in Paris.-- John Domini, "review of Drowning, by Lee Grove," New York Times, July 21, 1991

On the face of it, Henry Spencer Ashbee was a typical middle-class Victorian: a successful businessman, a strict paterfamilias.-- Iain Finlayson, "Victorian erotic values," Times (London), February 21, 2001
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(Find the 6 differences, answers below)