Sunday, May 31, 2020

Chuckle 5367




Chuckle 5367 Classic
Chuckle 651 ( sent out in April 2005)
(Mary in Los Osos gets double thanks for today’s chuckles!)
~Mood Ring~ ( Plus: Today in history, Word for the day, Today’s horoscope, Aunty Acid and  6 diff’s)

My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods.
We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns a beautiful blue-green.
When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.
Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.


~Old Harold~
Old Harold's In the Hospital Harold was an old man. He was sick and in the hospital. There was one young nurse that just drove him crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child.  She would say in a patronizing tone of voice, "And how are we doing this morning, or are we ready for a bath, or are we hungry?"
 Old Harold had had enough of this particular nurse.  One day, Old Harold had breakfast, pulled the juice off the tray, and put it on his bed side stand.  He had been given a urine bottle to fill for testing. The juice was apple juice.  So.....The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it.  "My, but it seems we are a little cloudy today " At this, Old Harold snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, "Well, I'll run it through again.  Maybe I can filter it better this time."
The nurse fainted!
Old Harold just smiled!
Don't mess with old people!


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(Today in History Click)
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
www.merriam-webster.com/word-of-the-day

(For today's Horoscope click Today's Horoscope)
http://www.prokerala.com/astrology/horoscope/

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