Chuckle 1590

Chuckle 1590
(Shirley L of Chemainus BC gets today's chuckle thanks!)

~Way to go Judge~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation
of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his
lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the
constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with
all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to
celebrate.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the
long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged
his gavel and declared,

"Case Dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and
said, 'Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case?
The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other
observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah ...
yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!'

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said,
'Obviously your client is too confused to even know about,
much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!'

The lawyer pompously said, 'Your Honor, we are unaware of
any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday
be, your Honor?'

The judge said, 'Well it comes every year on exactly the
same date --- April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st
as 'April Fools Day,' consider that Psalm 14:1 states, 'The
fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, in my
opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by
scripture, he is a fool, and April 1st is his holiday! Now
have a good day and get out of my courtroom!!

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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
_______________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1589

Chuckle 1589
(Pam S of Roseville CA gets today’s chuckle thanks!)

~Dusty Underwear ~
(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!!'

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer.

'What the Hell is this??’ he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.

'April,' he hollered into the bathroom, 'why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?'

She replied with a snicker... 'It's not talcum powder...... It's 'Miracle Grow'.' ***


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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet? A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
________________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chuckle 1588

Chuckle 1588
(Pat M of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)

~The Psychiatrist and the Proctologist ~ (2nd time around)
(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)

Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors."

The town council was not happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to read, "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids."

This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Catatonics and High Colonics." No go.

Next, they tried "Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives." Thumbs down again.

Then came "Minds and Behinds." Still no good.

Another attempt resulted in "Lost Souls and Butt Holes." Unacceptable again!

So they tried "Analysis and Anal Cysts." Not a chance. "Nuts and Butts?"

No way. "Freaks and Cheeks?" Still no go. "Loons and Moons?" Forget it.

Almost at their wit's end, the doctors finally came up with: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends."

Everyone loved it. ***

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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
________________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chucke 1587

Chuckle 1587 (part 2 of 1586)
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Retha A of Richland OR!)

~April 15th~ (Con't from yesterday's chuckle.)
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax,
Fuel permit tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Interest expense Inventory tax
IRS Interest Charges
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax) Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road usage taxes
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax
Telephone federal universal service fee tax
Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes
Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax
Telephone state and local tax
Telephone usage charge tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

COMMENTS: Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids. What happened?

And I still have to "press 1" for English! ***

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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"? A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are "Do It," "I can help," and "I can't get enough"? A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
________________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chucke 1586

Chuckle 1586 (Part 1)
(Retha A of Richland OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)











You people who read this around the world can see
that we in the United State don't have it as easy as
some think! ---Mr Chuckles---




~April 15th ~ Will repeat next year!
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries,
then Tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass

Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won't be done
Till he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He's good and sore.

Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he's laid.

Put these words upon his tomb,
"Taxes drove me to my doom..."

When he's gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.

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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

(If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.)

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
________________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chucke 1585

Chuckle 1585
(Charles M of Bradenton FL gets today's chuckle thanks!)

Green Persimmons

~Church down in Missouri~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

There was a church down in the Ozarks of Missouri that had a very big-busted organist. Her breasts were so huge that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ. Unfortunately, she distracted the congregation considerably.

The very proper church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.

One of the ladies approached her very discreetly and told her to mash up some green persimmons, and rub them on her breasts and maybe they would shrink in size but warned her to not eat any of the green persimmons though because they are so sour, they will make your mouth pucker up and you won't be able to talk properly for a while.

She agreed to try it.

The following Sunday morning the minister got up on the pulpit and said: "Dew to thircumsthanthis bewond my contwol we will not hath a thermon tewday"

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Pam S of Roseville CA gets our thanks for these questions and answers from Hollywood Squares!! (Some new some repeats)

(If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.)

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
________________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chucke 1584

Chuckle 1584
(Char of Goldbar WA gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~Friendship~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

(With none of that Sissy Stuff!!!!) Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

1 When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you that way.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want to catch whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy #@s!

9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask, "Because you are my friend".

And remember; Friendship is like peeing your pants: Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

...............Yep, They Walk Among Us!
_______________________________________________________


"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1583

Chuckle 1583
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Rick R Of Surrey BC!)

~The Fight~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

How the fight started I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!

He looked up at me and said "I am NOT Happy!"

So I said, "Well, which one ARE you then?"

That's how the fight started. ***


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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?"

............They Walk Among Us!
_______________________________________________________


(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chuckle 1582

Chuckle 1582
(Willie F of Sacramento CA gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~A Thanksgiving Story~ (2nd time around)
(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)

PREGNANT TURKEY One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you've cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs! Yep, SHE'S BLONDE! ***

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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

..............They Walk Among Us!
_______________________________________________________

"Have a nice Thanksgiving day!"

Chuckle 1581

Chuckle 1581
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Phyllis S of Pasadena CA!)


~Baptizing a Drunk ~ (2nd time around)
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. The drunk walks into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of booze. Whereupon he asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"

"Yes, I am," replies the drunk.

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the river. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?"

The drunk replies, "No, I haven't."

The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again, but for a bit longer this time. He pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"

The drunk again answers, "No, I have not found Jesus."

By this time the preacher is at his wits end, so he dunks the drunk in the water again, but this time he holds him down for about 30 seconds. When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up. The preacher asks the drunk again, "For the love of God, have you found Jesus?"

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?" ***

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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

...............They Walk Among Us!
______________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chuckle 1580

Chuckle 1580
(Jayne C of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)

~The Wal-Mart Cat~
(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)


A blonde was weed-eating her yard and accidentally cut off the tail of her cat which was hiding in the grass.

She rushed her cat, along with the tail over to WALMART!

v

v

v

v

v

v

v

Why WALMART???

v

v

v

v

v

v

v

WALMART is the largest retailer in the world!!!

GOTCHA!!!




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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."



..............They Walk Among Us!
______________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1579

Chuckle 1579
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Jack S of Santa Cruz CA!)

~Stages of Life~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

~The four stages of life~

Yep! That about sums it up!.
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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning she asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh I don't keep up with that stuff."

...............They Walk Among Us!!

______________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, for answers check spots on 3rd drawing
below.)

Chuckle 1578

Chuckle 1578
(Dean O of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~A Gift from God? ~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise.

After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.

After six children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's salary.

There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church.

Finally, the Preacher got up and spoke to the crowd," Children are a gift from God," he said.

Silence fell on the congregation. In the back pew, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers."

And the congregation said, "Amen." ***


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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"

...............They Walk Among Us!
______________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1577

Chuckle 1577
(Bev L of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~The Magician~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each Week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again.

One problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began To understand how the magician did every trick.

Once he understood, the parrot started shouting in the middle of the show

"Look, it's not the same hat!" "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table." "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"

The magician was furious, but couldn't do anything. It was, after all,
the captain's parrot.

Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle

Of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.

Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back:

"OK, I give up. Where's the F---in ship?" ***

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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)

"They Walk Among Us"
I walked into a Mickey D's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich.. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free" She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.

......... .....They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail.

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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)

Chuckle 1576

Chuckle 1576
(Joyce K of Florence AZ gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~Great Comeback~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time. When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response; knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response. "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

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Lora S of Florence gets our thanks for the following!)
"They Walk Among Us"

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave it back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor and gave her the money back. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back again...same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64. This actually happened in Austin at MoPac Blvd and Parmer Lane.

..............They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail.

________________________________________________________

"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1575

Chuckle 1575
(Today's chuckle thanks go to George H of Florence OR!)

~Ingredients in Viagra~ (2nd time around)
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

I knew it, I knew it!!! I knew they would finally list the ingredients in Viagra:

3% Vitamin E
2% Aspirin
2% Ibuprofen
1% Vitamin C
5% Spray Starch
87% Fix-A-Flat ***

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Phyllis S of Pasadena CA shares some of her remembrances with us. How many of these do you remember?

Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!

Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from

their "grown-up" life . .I double-dog-dare-ya!
________________________________________________________

(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)

Chuckle 1574

Chuckle 1574
(Catherine B of Florence gets today's chuckle thanks!)

Redneck House Boat

~Iraq Solution~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

The Pentagon announced TODAY the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF)

These Alabama boys will be dropped off into Iraq and have been given only the following facts about terrorists:

1. The season opened today.
2. There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus.
5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.

The Pentagon expects the problem in Iraq to be over by Friday.

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Phyllis S of Pasadena CA shares some of her remembrances with us. How many of these do you remember?

Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?

War was a card game?

Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?

Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
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"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1573

Chuckle 1573
(Today's chuckle thanks go to Willie F of Sacramento CA
Char S of ? in WA!)


~Cartoons on Aging~
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

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(Click Today in History and learn.)
. Today in history
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(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
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Phyllis S of Pasadena CA shares some of her remembrances with us. How many of these do you remember?

It wasn't odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?

The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?

Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?

Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?

"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)

Chuckle 1572

Chuckle 1572
(Pat M of Florence OR gets today's chuckle thanks!)


~The Divorced Barbie Doll ~
(Plus: Today in History and Word for the Day.)

One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly
remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a toy
shop and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's
in the display window?" The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean, Sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie for $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95". The amazed father asks:

"It's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"

The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: "Sir...,
Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat,
Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer and one of Ken's Friends ***


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______________________________________________________

(Click Today in History and learn.)
. Today in history
______________________________________________________

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
________________________________________________________

Phyllis S of Pasadena CA shares some of her remembrances with us. How many of these do you remember?

Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?

Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?

"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?

Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening?
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"Have a nice day!"

Chuckle 1571

Chuckle 1571
(Rich C of Yuma AZ gets today's chuckle thanks!)

~Old Folks Chuckle~ (2nd time around)
(Plus: Today in History, Word for the Day and 6 Differences.)

Three old mischievous Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home.

About then an old Grandpa walked by, and one of the old Grandma's yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell exactly how old you are."

The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess it, you old fools."

One of the old Grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we can tell your exact age."

Embarrassed just a little, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers.

The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times. Then they all piped up and said, "You're 87 years old!"

Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, "How in the world did you guess?"

Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three old ladies happily yelled in unison--

"We were at your birthday party yesterday!" ***

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_____________________________________________________

(Click Today in History and learn.)
. Today in history
______________________________________________________

(Sharpen your vocabulary by clicking Word for the Day)
(Word for the Day)
________________________________________________________
Phyllis S of Pasadena CA shares some of her remembrances with us. How many of these do you remember?


Lincoln Logs

The Fort Apache Play Set

15 cent McDonald hamburgers

5 cent packs of baseball cards - with that awful pink slab of bubble gum

Jiffy Pop popcorn


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(Find the 6 differences, answers below.)